Happy Holidays... be back in a jiffy!

As of last night at around 7:00 pm I'm officially on vacation for the next week! My friends safely arrived Christmas night and I was so glad to see them all. It's been so much fun already over the first couple of nights and I can't wait for all the rest of our upcoming adventures. I'll try to keep posting in the next couple of days but it will definitely be time permitting. Hope everyone out there enjoyed their Christmas with the ones they hold special.

Working Christmas Week

While it sucks that I still have to be at work this entire week up until the 28th a part of me feels so happy to be able to spend Christmas with some of my students. I handed out Christmas cards this year and although I slightly took some flack for it I shrugged it off since it brought smiles to the children's faces. The above picture are some of the cards and a bag of snacks that I received from some of the most kick ass kids in the world!

For you RAY!

Dug this up just for you Ray. You with the hat, me with the helmet. Best BBQ ever. Rawr!

K-K-Kamakura in a Flash

For some strange reason the winter weather here in the Tokyo area hit 18 degrees this past weekend. I'm not kidding at all. It was sunny and extremely warm, however a little windy. Almost good enough to go to a beach.. mmmmmm.. how I've so wanted to hit a beach for this past few weeks or so.

Since it was such nice weather outside I decided it was best to venture off to do outdoor tourism at Kamakura. Known as a very cultural and historical area I was expecting it to be just a small scale Kyoto. In a way it was, but at the same time I think there were parts of it I actually enjoyed more. Here at Kōtokuin is the Great Buddah Daibutsu. It's 13 meters high and the second largest Buddah in all of Japan. The statue was originally located in a building structure but giant tidal waves destroyed the building leaving only the statue itself. The inside of it is actually hollow and visitors can enter and look around. However I was slightly late and didn't get the chance to do so. Still, somewhat overwhelming to look at from the outside though. I'm glad I made it just as the sun was setting.


Tsurugaoka Hachiman-gu Shrine is a popular destination for New Year's. It's positioned in such a way that sunrise is viewable on a clear morning. Shrines and temples are traditional for New Year's celebrations here in Japan, and seeing the first sunrise is often regarded highly as optimistic fortunes for the year to follow. I'm most likely planning on visiting a temple this New Year's Eve but likely will just be staying within the Tokyo area.


Upon entering the shrine grounds there lies an unsually high concentration of pigeons. A handful of people actually engage them with food and seeds which can be obtained at a nearby stand. For the most part I'm quite afraid of pigeons and don't like being within close proximity of wild birds in general. I think I'm irked because of all the damn seagulls back in Toronto. This little girl was quite brave. I don't think I could bring myself to be a target for birds. At least not pigeons anyways, which one of my friends merely references them as "rats with wings."


Part of Kenchōji, I'd like to get into this one a bit more since it was extremely intricate and composed of several different viewing areas. I don't know enough history or information about it yet so I'll have to continue this later!

O Christmas Tree

This little guy is keeping the Christmas spirit alive in my apartment. And me singing Christmas songs out loud to myself on my couch. Sounds a tad bit sad but it's Christmas so anything goes!

Visitors in a Week!

It's Christmas next week! Yup yup, and I'll be lucky enough to have a handful of friends arriving on Christmas Day and crashing on my apartment floor until January. Can't wait to see these people again! Well not everyone in this picture, just the focus of Jennie and Karen.


This hobo is also making the trip and I fully expect him to get wasted beyond regular capacity. Everyone here in Japan gets drunk quicker anyways. "Blackout" will live again. For the record I tried to take him to rehab but he said "No, no, no."

For some reason I can't find a picture of Ray, but I didn't forget about you! Promise you won't regret picking Japan over Hong Kong.

Holiday Misinformation

When I was doing research on teaching overseas something that came up was the difference in traditional Japanese calendar holidays and celebrations. I was told by a few sources beforehand that Christmas wasn't that big of an occasion. I understood that it was just a regular day and that most business people even had to work through it. Since I'm pretty big on Christmas I thought I'd be missing home a lot more than I am now.


Pretty much all of the train stations, shopping malls, and parks here have some sort of holiday decoration. Lights are the big thing and many places actually look a lot more extravagant than back at home. The holiday season here does remind me a bit of home and I'm glad that the glamourous appearance of it is actually not too different. Maybe all the traditional pieces of the Christmas holiday are not accounted for, but the cosmetic and visual appeal of it is on par. Christmas will continually be swayed in a commercial Hallmark way anyhow so perhaps it all makes some logical sense.

Sayonara Manager???

Earlier tonight I got together with a few other Japanese teachers and some native English teachers from different schools resulting in a nice night out. On Friday my favourtite Japanese teacher came into my room with perhaps the most exciting work related news ever. She snuck in and asked me if she could borrow something, but then whispered to me that my manager is leaving at the end of December. I didn't know how to react but a part of me was overcome with disbelief. My current manager and I never really saw eye to eye and at times it's very difficult to be working in the same building as her. However, I've felt over the past month or so things have gone a lot better between us both. There were rumours that she was leaving at the end of February to another new school, but it seems now that date has been changed to the end of December.


Here's a picture of my coolest Japanese English teacher Yukiko and I. Since day one she's been the easiest person to talk to and we often talk and hang out after work. She spent some time in Toronto working and learning English so we actually have a lot in common. The days at work where I just feel like beating my head against a wall or whiteboard, she's been there for me to keep me grounded to reality. By far the coolest co-worker ever!

Beat Up by Schoolgirls

Today I encountered some of my Junior High School students and was assaulted shortly after seeing them. I took a vicious series of flailing arms and fists to the shoulder area, and was also victim of a swift kick just below the kneecap. Since I left in an emergency last week I had no time to personally tell the students or parents that I would be missing for the week. My Junior High's were under the impression I abruptly left without saying goodbye and that I wasn't planning on returning. It was actually quite scary and sort of sweet.

When class ended both of them took out their cell phones and exclaimed: "Let's take some pictures!" Just in case I do plan on leaving without any notice, they now have a few photos. They also asked for my keitai e-mail address... to which I responded "uhh.. I don't have one." Probably the best thing to do!

Sweethearts

First day back to work after my week absence and I honestly didn't know what to expect. Emotions are still running near critical mass and amongst them sadness continues to lead as a front runner. My Japanese co-workers have been more understanding than I could ask for and continue to offer their support. It was through two children though which made me almost completely break down.

A six year old and his two year old sister came to school today and before my class they entered and gave me a bundle of Japanese white lilies. They told me it was for my grandmother and me, and also that they hope she gets better soon. I was absolutely frozen and struck beyond belief... almost causing me to fall to pieces on the spot. I thanked them as much as I possibly could and still don't feel like it was enough. I also couldn't bear to tell them the truth about the situation and I hope that day will never come.

It's more than likely that they do not comprehend how much they've actually done to help me get through this part of my life. It's even more so amazing that the magnitude of a situation like this is alleviated through the innocence of children. Coming back has opened my eyes and definitely was the right thing to do.

Ready for Heartbreak

808's & Heartbreak - RoboCop

The great thing about coming home at 6 in the morning is that you're most likely to have a seat on the train. While I try not to make this a habit it seems that it occurs much too frequently. Woops. These nights usually help cure the soul though, so while I sacrifice sleep I do keep my zen in check by balancing my inner peace. I've officially readied myself for Heartbreak after doing some much needed thinking with the help of a few friends. ("...I get by with a little help from my friends!") Not that I want it to occur, but whatever happens will happen. I've accepted that.


Another great feast with a wholesome intake of greens. Cheers to everyone who showed up and helped make the night fun as usual.


Absolutely epic. I forgot how much fun this can be. It's funny how something as simplistic as a Parker Brother's board game can bring out the true colours of the people playing the game. My Park Place and Boardwalk need more lovin'.

Leaving Toronto... again

First of all my family and I would like to thank everyone who has shown their concern for us over the past month, in particular the past few days. We can't express how much appreciation we have for everyone who has respected our wishes and privacy during this time of need.

This entire week has been too emotional for words and during this period time itself has been something which I feel cannot be calculated accurately. My family and I have probably only slept for a couple of hours each night at best.

I can be blatantly honest by saying that this trip home has brought me nothing but pain, agony, and sorrow. Thoughts of being home start out in content nostalgia but easily fade into sadness as I quickly remember the terms of my visit. Not fully understanding or being able to control a situation has always bothered me as an individual. Being powerless to act or to react is undoubtedly one of the worst feelings in the world.

I cannot help but feel cowardly since my stay has only been a mere four days. To be honest I simply cannot be here and need to try and find comfort in the routine I've created for myself over the past seven months or so. With each sparing moment of the day I can only do what I can to distract myself as best as possible. I will not allow myself to find comfort in pain.

I did speak with a very close old friend however, and she was entirely supportive of my decisions. She believes my actions are the methods of coping I have selected best suited for me. I can only hope she is right. Thank you once more for providing me with your console. And maybe one day you can forgive me for not being as good as a friend to you, that you have been for me.

Helplessness

I talked. She wasn't able to talk back. I squeezed. She wasn't able to squeeze back. I cried. I begged. I pleaded. She wasn't able to do anything. Nothing. Things weren't supposed to happen this way. Things were supposed to be different. I was supposed to make it back home in time.


The last time I saw you, you were seeing me off at the airport looking just a little bit heartbroken yet at the same time inexplicably content with the situation. Like you knew things would be alright and we would see each other again.

You were supposed to be there to greet me at the airport when I returned home next year.

You were supposed to come to "yum cha" with me like times before.

You were supposed to be there for me when the time comes for me to get married.

You were supposed to not worry about me even though for the first time in our lives we would be over 6,000 miles away.

You were supposed to hold on just a little bit longer.

You were supposed to answer when I called and reached out for you.

You were supposed to have more time.


Perhaps it's only fitting. You didn't want me to leave for Japan yet you knowingly understood it would be best for my future. You worried about my well being everyday I was gone instead of getting better. You fought so hard over the past month or so; I don't think I'll ever be able to understand or begin to imagine the pain you had to suffer. I miss you and love you, and you weren't able to hear me say it one last time. If we really do meet five people in Heaven, you'll be there waiting for me once more to explain why things had to happen the way they did.

But above all else, maybe one day you'll be proud of me.